Hollywood Humph

The Tiki Bar is now open….

Did not sleep well, not sure if it was just a crazy weekend or did I have a million things on my mind. It seemed like a normal Monday for me. Went to work, came home, ate and went to bed. Up in the middle of the night and was sweating really bad. I had to move to the other side of my bed because the sheet was wet. Went to work on Tuesday and noticed people had flu like symptoms. I was feeling a little run down myself. Was a little pissed thinking I was getting sick. Next night I woke up again in a puddle of sweat, this time I had to change the sheets. Not a fun thing to do at 3 AM unless you are getting laid…… A new 1400 count sheet is better than lying on a towel all night…isn’t ladies? It’s Thursday and I am getting a bad cough, must be all part of this flu going around I thought to myself. I called the doctor and told him my symptoms and he called in some cough medicine with some codeine to help me sleep. Seemed to work, no night sweats and the cough was going away.

The weekend has arrived….yeah. We are headed to Islamorada. God do I love that place. We all arrived around noon time and I felt good. I little run down but much better than the past few days. We partied all day. The “Weather is here, wish you were beautiful”…A little Jimmy Buffet for you….. We drove back Sunday and there was a big parade in downtown Hollywood for Saint Patrick’s Day. I still did not feel 100% but I wanted to see the parade and hang out a bit.

Monday rolled around and I felt tired. I was at work and decided to go to the doctor for some reason. I thought maybe he could give me something… I went and he said there was not much he could do because it could be the flu and I just needed to ride the storm out… I was about to walk out the door and he recommended we take some blood and run a test. I was sooooo pissed because I hate needles. I don’t like to get a shot nor do I like to give blood. I kept thinking to my self….”Humph, you dumb ass, if you would of walked a little faster out the door there would be no giving of blood”. Now I have to feel the needle penetrating my skin….I may just have to take a break from writing this because my anxiety is sky high right now. Hate needles….. They took the blood and the doctor said I should go home and rest and he would call me with the results. I went back to work and finished up some work and I went home. Once I was home I got into my Relaxin Shorts. Made myself some dinner and watched some TV.

My phone is always on vibrate because of work. It must have been around 7:30 or so and I looked at my phone and I had one voicemail. I dialed into my voicemail and little did I know this was going to change my life as I knew it. The doctor was talking franticly saying I most go to the hospital immediately and my blood counts were high and low?. I called the number back and got the answering service. As they were connecting me to the doctor, my phone was lighting up with calls and text messages from my parents and my sisters. The doctor is now on the phone. He is breathing fast and is talking so quick. He said my white blood cell count is over 80 and my red blood cell count is around 4.7. I said so what does that mean? He said he has never seen such counts in his 20 years in practicing medicine and I need to go check into the hospital immediately. Now I am 100% completely shaking in my shoes. I don’t feel bad; I was just about to jump into bed. I got off the phone and thought what the hell I should wear to the hospital. My Relaxin Shorts have never been outside. Oops….There has been one lady who got me to go out in my Relaxin Shorts late at night….She is going to be a new mama. I miss you Leah… Anyway, where the hell was I? So I threw some clothes on and grabbed a HoHo because I thought I would be hungry. I walked down the hall to Tim and Anthony’s place and knocked on the door. Tim came to the door and I said I have to go to the hospital. He said “he knows”…Word travels quickly. The doctor had called my mom and dad. The doctor told them if he did not get a hold of me he was going to call the Hollywood police department and have them get me. He was worried I was passed out. We drove to Memorial Hospital in Hollywood. Talked to my mom and dad and my sisters and we all no idea what was going on. The only thing they knew was what the doctor told them.

I am getting checked into the emergency room at this time. I explained to the doctor what my doctor told me. So what do they do…You guessed it….They took my blood and they started an IV. God do I hate needles. I am lying in bed and watching re-runs of Family Guy. Tim was keeping me company. I told him the emergency room doctor looked familiar. I finally realized where I knew him from. He was the same doctor I saw when I had my ass problem last year…Of all the luck. That doctor forgot to give me an antibiotic last year and made my life miserable for 3 weeks.

The nurse game back and gave me the results of the blood test and she mentioned Leukemia. I said what is that? I could not remember what it is. She said it was a disease of the blood. I am in total denial. I told her to double check the results. I think they have my results mixed up with someone else. She said my white blood count was over 80 which is really high and my red blood cell count was around 4.5. She said she could not believe I was conscious….I said why? She said if your red blood cell count was at 7 they would give you a blood transfusion. If you are at 6, then about 90% of people pass out. You are at 4.5 and you are sitting in bed eating chips and watching Family Guy…honestly…you should be dead….. Wow, that’s a lot to take for a Monday night.

I noticed as the night went on, there were a lot of doctors and nurses popping their heads into my room. I’m sure word had spread on the floor that there was some freaky guy who has an extremely low red blood cell count and looks normal….The boy in the bubble…. Off to the 6^th floor I go….. Tim has now called my parents and told them what is going on. They are getting on a plane and will be down here by Wed.

The sixth floor is like a freak show. Here I am lying in bed and have 2 IV’s in me. I am scared shitless and not a clue what is happening to me. Once again…I really don’t feel that bad. I honestly think they have me mixed up with an 85 year old guy…. Then it happens. Doctors and nurses come into my room with these face masks and yellow gowns on. They told me no one is to come into my room without these things on. It was like something out of a scary movie. The doctors once again mentioned Leukemia and reality was starting to set in but I really did not know much about it. One of the nurses came in to my room new me. I remembered her. She was a friend of Dave and Tom’s. They tried to hook me up with this nurse. But she talked so much I could never get a word in. So it never went any further. She was going to be my nurse for 2 days. I bet she got pure joy from sticking needles and putting a new IV in me since I never asked her out. Paybacks are hell……

I called Heather. This was not a call I wanted to make. I get upset just thinking about it. I told her they think I have leukemia. It took every ounce of my energy not to cry on the phone. Even though I could not see her, I could feel the pain I just delivered to her. Something I hope no one ever has to go through….You are such a good friend.

People at work are now finding out I am in the hospital. They really don’t know what is going on and the same with me….I seem to me in a daze… The nurses have been coming in every so often and taking my blood…I don’t know how much longer I can take this….I don’t even know what the hell they are doing with it. Maybe they are all vampires and I am the only human left. This is what heavy meds will do to you….

Mom and pops have arrived….Dam do they look scared. My mom almost squeezed me to death. Everybody is still wearing those masks and yellow gowns. When will the madness end? Sometimes people would come into my room and I don’t know who they are because of the gowns and masks. It’s not as easy as you would think. I remember looking into the eyes of a few of my friends and co-workers. They had a shattered look and I could not even see the rest of their faces. Some looked like they were going to cry. I felt bad people had to see me like this.

It was Wed afternoon and my parents went to go get something to eat. I was all alone and for the first time and I thought I was going to die. It seems so surreal. I broke down in tears and thought is this how it’s going to end? I started looking around my room and seeing all the stuff hooked into my body. I wanted to tear it all out of my arms. I can’t stand these shots and I really hate these IV’s. I don’t want to be in the hospital any more.

It’s been a real long time since I had a good cry. I started to think about all the craziness in my life and how I wanted to get back to it. My Family and friends will always be there for me…. If I was going to die I wanted to make sure I was going to be buried in my Elbo Room t-shirt and my favorite flip flops…You know the ones with a bottle opener on the bottom. It all came to a head and I realized I am not to type of person to piss and moan about anything. I am going to beat this, not sure how and what I need to do. To much to do and so little time… The game is on….

Holy cow I am going to the 8^th floor…the top floor…the floor you go to when you are really sick…the floor where they treat you like a king. The Oncology Floor…The Humphman has arrived.

If my memory serves me correctly, I was in room 837. I must have good insurance because I have a room all to myself. There are some really sick people on this floor. I kept thinking to myself I don’t belong on this floor. Little did I know I would be spending a month of my life in that room.

CLL, Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia stage 4 is what I have been officially diagnosed with. What the #$%^ ? How does this happen? Why does this happen? Beats the hell out of me. One day you are having a time of your life and the next day may not come. The best I can describe what happened is as follows: I have a happy cell which decided it did not feel like dying. Remember…. all good cells know when they are suppose to die. My happy cell wants to reproduce like a mad man. My happy cell was having sex 24 hours a day for maybe a week and I didn’t even get to enjoy it. Like a typical man, my happy cell was exhausted after having sex and just wanted to sleep. Sorry, it’s in the genes……

How do you officially find out you have CLL? A bone marrow biopsy is how you do it. Doesn’t that just sound crazy? It sounds terrifying. I was scared shit less. All I could think about was this big ass needle being stuck in my bone some where and it is going to hurt like hell. So what did I do? I requested some information on what they actually do. You don’t want to know…This needle is like a cork screw and it takes your marrow out of the bone. Not fun….So I have already determined I better not feel a thing. How can I be sure of this? Apparently there are three ways you can receive medication so you don’t feel it. The first is three shots to numb the area around the hip. The second is pain medication through your IV and you also get the three shots to the hip. The third is you are completely out. I want to be completely out. If I feel this pain I’m going to loose it. I told every nurse, doctor and even the lady who brings me food I don’t want to feel anything on this biopsy.

They are rolling me down stairs to get the biopsy. My nurse told me I am going to the twilight zone. They lay me down on a bed and this machine takes pictures of my hip and ass. I really do have one tight ass and it is pure white. Anyway, they put this grid around the top of my hip; for this is where they are going to stick a 2 foot needle in my bone….There are few nurses and doctors talking and seem to be having a good time at work. I thought to myself, I would be laughing if I was going to shove a three foot needle into somebody. It seems like they are ready to do it. I am scared beyond belief. I said “when am I going to get some painkillers?” The nurse comes over and says for me to relax. Relax you say? Relaxing is when I am in my Relaxin shorts and in front of the TV. Relaxing is what I want to do after I throw your legs on my shoulders and screw you….

I never said it, but I thought it…. She opens my IV and puts medicine in it. I would say within 2 mins I am feeling wonderful about myself. I am starting to get a little chatty with this nurse, she then gives me some more medicine…Shazam! My body is heading to the twilight zone. I was thinking my nurse was pretty hot and she has a great rack. Please let me touch your boobies. Thank God I am lying on my stomach. I’m probably the only one to get a woody before a bone marrow biopsy. The doctor said “You are now going to get three shots and it is going to feel warm.” It was not warm. It felt like a hot iron on my ass. He said he was done with the shots. I kept talking to the nurse as if I was trying to pick her up or something. This went on for a few minutes. I asked the doctor when he was going to do it. He said he was done. I told him he was good and I did not feel it. Back to the 8^th floor. Sleep I did….

Friday is chemo day…My first. One of the side effects is I might get cold and the shakes. You guessed it…I got it. My mother and father decided to go get some lunch. I am in bed trying to sleep and then it happened. I woke up and I thought to myself. Who came into my room and turned down the air conditioner? I put another blanket on and laid back down. Woke up again and I was shivering. My teeth were chattering and it reminded me when I was a young lad living in the great state of Ohio. It was a cold day and I was sledding all day and my friend brought me home because I was so cold and could barely talk. Anyway, my friend Leo stopped by and he was talking to me but I could hardly talk back. By this time, my other friends Michael, Vivian, Lauren, and Leslie stopped by. All hell was breaking loose with my body. I was chattering uncontrollable. My body was bouncing up and down on the bed like a wet fish out of water. I was freezing. I was trying to tell everyone I was fine and I was sorry they had to see me like this. I was now starting to worry I was going to bite my tongue or even my lips. Please don’t let me crack my teeth because of this….The nurse comes in and is putting blankets on top of me. The doctor has been called. Everybody is watching the freak show and I am the star. I don’t think anybody would have been surprised if my head spun in a circle. A bizarre exorcist; live… Right here on the 8^th floor. The doctor gave me a steroid and I calmed down. What a workout that was. They took off the blankets and want to guess how many? Nine of them….holy shit…. Back to the chemo; they turned down the flow rate and I was fine the rest of the day. First round is complete…

When your chemo is complete they give you a shot in the morning and shot in the evening of neupogen. This is a drug is suppose to give your white blood cells a kick in the ass to get growing again. The shot is to be given in a fatty part of your body. Well as my first nurse looked me over…I don’t have any fat….I wished I did have some fat, but by this time I had already lost almost 20 lbs. Everybody who knows me realizes I do not have any fat to loose. Just about all of you have said to me at least once “You can have some of mine” The “Fat Boys” tell me every time I see them…So don’t feel so bad!

The nurse finally gave me shots in the back of my arms….I tried to keep telling the nurse my arms were solid as a rock and there was no way there is any fat back there. She gave me the shot anyway. Let me tell you about getting a shot of neupogen, if administered correctly, it’s like good sex. We talk about it for awhile, and then we penetrate the skin; take your time making the delivery, pull out and then eat some chocolate chip cookies. Let me just say, not everybody knows how to give a good shot. Well after about three days of getting those shots, the back of my beautiful arms were completely back and blue. Holy cow, one of the nurses decided she was going to the shots to me in my stomach. What the #$%^. Once again, if administered correctly, they did not hurt too badly. If the medicine went in to fast, it felt like my skin was on fire. All and all I had about 60 shots of this one drug and about 50 of them in my gut. No Fun….

My sisters Carol and Monica came down for a long weekend. They have now joined my mother and father. It was nice; they got to meet some of my friends. We are all in my hospital room just all staring at each other. I often wonder what it would be like to be on the other side. I got to experience the feeling when Christina got her tonsils taken out about a month ago. My family and I talked non-stop about how this could have happened. We could not come up with any answers. It just does. I’m a firm believer the big man upstairs doesn’t throw anymore on what you can handle. Maybe he is trying to un-do my fear of needles. If he did, I wish he could have thought of something else.

The doctors came into my room during the day and I was glad my family was there. I heard what I wanted to hear. They sometimes heard something else. But the good thing is we always talked about it and made sense of it. Communication is the key; it will always let you know where you stand with people. My family was the one asking most of the questions. I think I had not accepted anything yet about my problem so it may come across I didn’t give a shit. I did…But I did not know what to ask. It was a very confusing time in my life. Everybody I knew was looking up CLL online except for me. They were telling me things about it; I just was not ready for it. I can’t explain it. Maybe I could not figure out how this was going to get any better. Through out my entire life I have always figured out a way to survive on my own; and for once, I don’t have an answer. This is going to harder than I thought.

Everybody looks tired; it is a long day when you stare at one person for 10 hours. We talked about the rest of the family and I would make jokes to keep people smiling and laughing. I think it’s my job in life to find a way to make people laugh; even now more than ever. It’s something I really enjoy. I remember the weekend they were down here. It was raining all weekend. The sun goddess was out on vacation. I know Mitch was not happy about that. We finally got a little bit of sun and the nurse told me I could go outside for about 30 minutes. She un-hooked my IV. Sweet Jesus…Free at last. The humphman was free at last. This just reminded me of verse in a Jimmy Buffett song….

So I'll put on my bob marley tape
And practice what I preach
Get jah lost in the reggae mon
As I walk along the beach
Stay in touch with my insanity really is the only way
Its a jungle out there kiddies
and here we are at old Fenway

Name of the song? Anyone? I will let you think about it.

So we cruised out of my room and I was wearing my best hospital gown and my flip flops with the bottle opener on the bottom. I had my face mask on so know one would recognize me; for I did not want to draw a crowd. We walked over to the parking lot and I remember leaning up against a light pole. The sun felt so good against my face. I lifted my gown up so I could sun on my calves. They looked like they needed some attention. I was outside and I can’t tell you how good it felt. The smell of fresh air. The sounds of birds and cars going by. Little did I know I would not be able to go outside for another2 ½ weeks.

Walking back to the room and getting settled in was sad because I got to taste a bit of freedom. But I was grinning because it felt so good to feel alive even though it was for a short period of time. Time was running out and my sisters were getting to leave. I’m so happy they came down. They had to get back to their life with their families. My mom and dad were wondering when they were going to leave as well. They stayed a few more days. We talked about it for awhile. I was feeling fine and told them there was nothing they could do right now. It is draining on people when you sit in a hospital room for long periods of time. I told them I would call them immediately if something went wrong and I knew they would be down here on the next flight out. They also knew Tim, Mitch, Christina, Sean and Tiffany were visiting me everyday. There were plenty of friends stopping by all time. They knew I was good hands.

I think it’s time to talk about all of the people who came to see me. I think you all were responsible for making that big ball of visitor stickers when you check out. I was always happy to see friendly people come walking in the door. If they did not use the hand sanitizer, Christina would remind them this is a clean environment. I think she used at least two cans while she was visiting me. She may of even asked one of the nurses where she could buy a can or two. She really liked it. There were so many visitors at one time we stole chairs from the room next door. Although we did get busted by one of the doctors one night because he could barely make his way over to me. He must have chewed out one of the nurses. He said no more that 4 visitors at a time going forward. Whatever…. Go bother someone else… you asked my how I was feeling, made me breath deep so you could listen to my chest and as I later found out later charged my insurance company a couple of hundred bucks. What a job and get some people skills. I apologized to my nurse.

It seemed like everyone who came to see me brought food. I love to eat. My room was filled with all kinds of goodies. There were chocolate chip cookies…Thank you Heather. Mitch brought me cotton candy. I got care packages from friends in Ohio; thank you Tom and Tamera. I even got a 1 hour message from Ron and Laura. Sean and Tiffney supplied me with coffee and muffins. My boss brought me skyline chili. Heather and Marisa brought me in a full fledge Italian dinner, there was so much I was stuffed and I offered my nurses a plate. I know they enjoyed it…Who would not want to eat something which was specifically made for you. Thanks again. Let me tell you about the chocolate cookies. Everyone who came to visit me wanted one. After a while I had to clamp down and say no more; these cookies would be my life savor. I will tell you about the cookies later. Who ever else brought me food…Thank You.

Let me tell you what my day was like on the 8^th floor for the next few weeks. I was starting to grow a beard. I was not allowed to use a razor; I guess they thought I was going to slit my writs or something. I finally got an electric razor. Hurts the hell out of my face but that all I was allowed to use. I wanted to get the grub off so because I did not want to look like Grizzly Adams or maybe even a porn star. I had enough trouble to deal with. I would wake up about 5am when the vampires came into my room. Hello Steven….I knew it was going to happen. My anxiety just went through the roof. So, how many vials of blood are you going to take? I would scour the Home depot cart…It was an orange one. The machine she was caring would spit these stickers out. The more stickers the more viles. On average 3- 4 a night. She would stare at my arms…god did she love my veins. She said I wish everyone had veins like you. If she does not shut up I’m going to kill her as I am staring at the ceiling counting the holes in the tile. It seemed like it took forever but then it was done. I would take a few minutes to calm down. She then left my room. I would then turn to get a few chocolate chip cookies and this made me feel good. I sometimes would eat a Hostess twinkie. I am now up because the vampire interrupted my deep REM sleep. Yeah right. I have IV’s in my arm and the worse possible bed to sleep on. Mara did bring me an egg shell and we stuck it under the mattress. It made it better. I remember turning all the lights off and staring out the window and seeing the city lights. Wishing I could be out there. So close but yet so far….Anybody know that song? My eyes adore you….Anyway, I would watch TV for an hour or so then go back to bed.

I would wake up about 8am or so because this is the time the nurse would come in. I could hear the door squeak. The nurse would come in and introduce herself and write her name on the board. She would stay only for a few minutes. I knew she would be back later to give me my medications. I knew the craziness would begin in about an hour or so. I get the medications and I would have to get a shot in my stomach. My anxiety is starting to build. Getting a shot requires you have some fat on your body. I did not have much at all but I just have to deal with it. Ok, another round of medication and shot is complete. Time to eat….

Hospital food… It keeps you alive. I usually had eggs and cereal for breakfast. Well, I had it everyday for a month. Gets boring after awhile. I wish someone would make me pancakes. It never seemed to fail the doctors would always come in to see me when I was eating. They would ask me how I feel….how would you feel if you were stuck in this place? Don’t answer that! We would talk about my blood work and how nothing had changed. It appears the chemo is really doing its job. It’s saving my life, but I still can’t leave the hospital. I think between 10am and 1pm were the hardest for me. I was bored. There was no one around except for the ladies who would come in and clean my room. They were nice and we always talked. Just keep praying, and have a good attitude and you will be fine she would tell me. I met so many of these good people that I knew about their lives. How many kids they have. Some were going to nursing school at night. I am a firm believer; if you just take the time with people you will be awarded 10 fold in life.

Tim would usually come to see me in the afternoon. Tim was the one who brought me to the hospital and hung with me the whole night until they admitted me. Many times the doctor would stop by and talk to me. I was glad Tim was there for a second set of ears. It’s funny I would hear what I wanted to hear. Usually, I was about half right. Tim would always find a way to explain something to me and make it make sense….

You are good friend…

It’s already dinner time. My food would come about 5pm or so and I would chow it down. I learned over time I could always order other food which was not on the nightly menu. That’s what you get when you take the time to talk to the lady who cleaned my room. By this time, I would try to track down my nurse and have her un-do my IV so I could take a shower. I did not get to shower everyday. That bothered me; especially when I knew people were coming to see me. Sean, Tiffany, Christina, Mitch, Tim would visit me everyday. How lucky am I? Always good to see a friendly face. I can’t tell you how many times they would witness a shot I would have to get, give blood or even change my IV. Changing the IV was the hardest one for me; but you always held my hand. Something I will never forget. J The night would go on and we would talk about everything under the sun. In many ways it seemed so normal but I knew in reality it was not. It’s not normal for friends to come up and see someone everyday for a month. Does it happen…Yes! But in my eyes; not normal. But that is what makes life exciting. Never a dull moment. Keeps you coming back for more.

Sometimes I would be completely surprised who would walk through the door. There were friends who lived in my building. There were people I worked with and use to work with. Michael would come to see me and call me all the time to check in. Just wanted to make sure I was ok. Mac would drive all the way from Naples to hang out for a few hours and drive all the way back. My buddy Rick was in Orlando with his family and he drove down for the afternoon. Eric, I will always cherish the conversation we had that night. It’s an inspiration and I will strive for it everyday. I would get oatmeal cream pies from friends in Jacksonville. Holy cow Jim and Melinda just showed up. It was great to see you guys. Not matter if you saw me in the hospital, called me, text me, emailed me you all made a difference in my life. You allowed me to enjoy your friendships in many different ways. Getting away from my daily grind and reminding me how much I appreciate you all. There is a good life outside of these hospital walls. I can’t wait until I can start to participate in it again. It’s worth living for…

Can you imagine being in that hospital for a month? It really was starting to get routine for many aspects of my stay. Shots, take blood, eat, and shower. I started to think if I don’t do something different I would just wither away. So I started to walk to hallways. It started off in the beginning; I would push my IV machine around. That my friend is no easy task; I later determined I would have the nurse un-hook me from the machine. I can’t tell you how good that felt to walk the halls with nothing attached to you. Many times I would walk with my flip flops on. You know the ones with a bottle opener on the bottom of them. Maybe I was somehow thinking someone would offer me a nice cold Budweiser as I was walking down the hall. When I would reach the end of the hallway, I would always look out the little window on the exit door. Somehow thinking one of my friends would kidnap me from this place. I never saw anyone.

Over time I would start to wear my tennis shoes with my bright orange Cincinnati Bengal socks. Everyone loved them except for a few people from the New England area. They are just trying to phantom the idea the Bengals with be playing them in the AFC Championship game in Cincinnati. Dreams do come true…. Back to the shoes; I made a pact to myself. I was going to walk those halls come hell or high water. This time was going to be different. I was now wearing my Relaxin shorts and some of my favorite t-shirts. You should of seen me…God did I look good. You have to have some pride in your clothing no matter where you are. I was walking those halls sometimes two and three times a day. I really enjoyed walking with people. It was as close as I was going to get of trying to feel normal. It made me happy. I felt better too. The one think I did not like was wearing the face mask. Everyone just kind of stares at you; I often wondered if they thought they would catch something from me if I breathed on them. They say the mask was for my protection. Whatever; I did what they said without question. Isn’t funny how your whole life changes and one can get excited about walking the halls of a hospital floor.

When will this madness end? Did you ever just sit back and say what the hell? Is he ever going to get out of there? I got to the point were I was starting to think about that. My counts were so close. The magic number on the white blood cell count was 1. I needed that number. Hit that number and the kid gets to go home. Up one day, down one day; the counts were random and I wondered if it was ever going to happen.

My brother and his family are here. They would come to hospital and spend time with me. I’m sure my two nieces would have been happier sitting on the beach catching some rays. God knows I would of wanted to. My brother brought me some skyline one day and we pigged out. Skyline…You either love or hate it. We had conversations about the rest of the family and how everyone was doing. It was good to see them. I know my mother and father were happy they were down here. I’m sure getting a full report on my condition was comforting to them.

We were all in the room and it was around lunch time. David and his family decided to go to the cafeteria. Then it happened. My doctor came in and said “Steven pack your bags, you are going home young man”. I said you are kidding right…he said no. They did a manual count on the blood test are I was above 1. Holy shit! I am above 1. I started to shake un-controllable. I almost started to cry. I told him to wait and I called my brother back and told him he needed to come to the room immediately. They showed up in a few minutes and the doctor told them as well. I think I just needed to have someone else hear it. We were all so happy. The doctor said it would take hours before I get discharged. I looked at my nieces and said go to the beach. Have fun… They spent the day at the beach and I was calling people and emailing them and said I am going home. What a feeling…

Here I am sitting in my hospital bed with no IV in me. I get to go home. My mind was racing a million miles an hour; Just as it did when I came into the hospital. That’s weird. I don’t even know if I can picture what my condo looks like. It seems like it’s been forever since I’ve been there. Everyone in my family stayed at my condo in the past month except for me. The day was progressing and I ate my last lunch. It was good. There was nothing right now going to get me down. I still had a weird feeling someone would come back and tell me I could not go. I don’t know why, maybe it just had not sunk in yet.

The word on the floor was I was going home and so many of the nurses stopped by. They were all wishing me the best of luck. I was just grinning ear to ear. They took such good care of me. What else more can I say?

How does one wrap this up? Was this a wake up call? This is by no means over yet. Was this a bump in the road? I don’t know. I don’t have a good reply on why this even happened to me. I do think it is a reminder for all of us to cherish our friendships. I have been so blessed to have such good people around me during this crazy period in my life. I don’t know if I would have been able to get by on my own. What would of happened if I did not answer the doctor’s call on 3/16/2009 and went to bed? Some things happen for a reason, some things we can not explain nor should we.

Your friendships and love I will forever keep close to me.

That is all….

Steven